Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Boy or Girl??

Our big day is less than a week away. This time next week we'll be telling Garrison all about his new baby brother or sister (hopefully we'll have a name by then... that is if it's a girl, the boy name is ready to go) and we'll start getting ready for Baby #2 to arrive and I'll start wanting to buy him or her new clothes. In my opinion, there's not a whole lot we can do until we know boy or girl and if it happens to be a girl, we've got tons to do to get ready. I mean we don't have a single pink anything. Anyway, I am SO excited to find out. But I'm also sort of nervous because you do hear of some couples who can't find out on their appointment day because baby wouldn't cooperate. I'm praying that after our appointment next Tuesday we are 100% sure.

I'm also looking forward to celebrating with the family afterwards. We're continuing a tradition of sorts that started with finding out Garrison was a boy. Terrell surprised me with inviting our parents and my sister to meet us at one of our favorite restaurants in Conyers so we could share the big news in person. I was sort of bummed about having to tell everyone over the phone and not being able to celebrate with family, so Terrell arranged for everyone to meet for dinner the night of my appointment. Terrell's mom even brought in a pink balloon and a blue balloon and we had them both tied to my chair. Then we had to pop the "wrong" one so everyone would know "It's a boy". We're planning to reveal the gender the same way at the same restaurant this time! It was such a sweet surprise last time and we loved sharing our news and celebrating such a special occasion with family.... so we're keeping the tradition. I guess if for some reason the baby doesn't cooperate, we'll just have to reschedule.

The closer we get to Tuesday the more I'm analyzing every little thing and trying to determine if this is a sign it's a girl or that is a sign it's a boy. For example, when I talk to Garrison about the baby and refer to it as Garrison's baby brother or sister, he always says, "Garrsin baby sisser". Hmmm. And, recently I've caught myself referring to the baby as a "he" a couple of times even though throughout the pregnancy my instinct has been more girl. Again I wonder. Then there's the fact that so far we absolutely cannot come up with a girl name we love. There are plenty we really like, and a handful that we both agree on but for some reason non of them will stick. We always think of something about it we dont' like... it's too long, it will be mispronounced a lot, the spelling is different, so and so's baby is named that, etc. We also struggle with liking certain names but then deciding the name doesn't fit us. It might be a sweet, cute name but it doesn't sound like the name of our little girl. Crazy I know. The boy name on the other hand is decided and probably not changing. Sooo, is it a sign? I've also been thinking about the pregnancy in general and the baby's heart rate. This pregnancy has been pretty similar to the pregnancy with Garrison except the one week I was super sick, and I feel like I'm carrying the baby the same as Garrison. The heart rate is a little on the high end (faster than Garrison's) but also sort of in the middle. I know you can't go by any of these things but I still think about them. It's so funny because this baby has been a boy or girl right from the start but it's still so tempting to analyze everything and feel like it's just being decided this week.

It really doesn't matter to me either way, girl or boy, I'm just ready and excited to know! A part of me would love to have another boy. I love being the mama of a boy and I'd love to have another one. I picture them playing together and having things in common and being best buds as they grow up. I know how close my sister and I are, so I think 2 boys back to back will be close like that too. But, I would also love to have a little girl. I think the mother/daughter relationship is so special and I hope to experience that one day. I'd love a daughter to dress up in adorable girly clothes, plus to be able to do girl things with like shop and get our nails done. And I have to say I honestly think Garrison will be a great big brother to either one. I know every parent probably says that about their oldest but I really do think he's going to be loving and helpful and curious and sweet. (I guess I should start praying for those things now so I'm not disappointed!) Anyway, no matter what, we feel so blessed to welcome this baby into our family and know that God planned for this little one to make us a family of four.... girl or boy. I am looking forward to Tuesday and getting ready to become the mama of two sweet boys or evening things up around here and having one of each! Can't wait!!

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