Friday, June 22, 2012

Ready or Not

Well, vacation is upon us... tomorrow. So today we're packing up, loading up, cleaning up, and packing up some more. You know how Tuesday I was SO excited and SO looking forward to a vacation and just SO thrilled? I can remember that a little. But only a little because things went downhill after that post. For some reason blogging about stuff also leads to a jinx. Guess I need to remember that. Just kidding.

Anyway, Tuesday afternoon Austin started with a rash on his face. Just a few little, light, red spots. That eventually spread. Oh dear.

Then, we spent the day Wednesday in B'ville with AnAn. We got the jeep serviced so we'd be good to go for vacation and we went swimming with AnAn. Since I have to have a "helper" if I'm going to ever take the boys swimming, it worked out perfect. Except that Austin's rash/breakout got worse and started resembling chicken pox. (Although he didn't have a single one on his chest or belly and didn't have any other symptons.)

And except the part about finding out that our jeep may or may not have some serious issues and may or may not be going downhill fast. Great. We were planning on keeping it for another 2 years at least, maybe longer. Hopefully it's nothing but it's still concerning to hear you might need to brace yourself for a new car before you're ready. It's stressful to even think about. BUT, we're not going to fret over it just yet. We'll cross that bridge when we get there.

So back to Austin. Bright and early yesterday morning I took him to the doctor and it was determined that it's definitely an allergy/allergic reaction. Which was a relief. But still kind of scary since we're not 100% sure what exactly he's allergic too. We were thinking blueberries since that was the only thing new he'd eaten... but the thing is, it's not clearing up. We're giving him Benadryl (and we have an epipen we hope we never have to use) but there's still no real sign of the rash going away. I'm thinking it maybe, might be, sort of fading.

I tried to make a picture of him but my camera doesn't do it justice. Poor baby has them all over his little face, arms, and legs.

Then yesterday I had a really rough day with the boys and it sort of hit me that vacation was going to be a lot of work. Garrison won't magically become well behaved and obedient 24-7. Austin won't magically not get into stuff that's unsafe and he can't have. Naptimes and bedtimes and our little routine will remain. And we'll be in a new place away from home. And the realization of it all got me overwhelmed and stressed out. And emotional. Ugh. Add to that the new "weather model/tropical whatever" in the Gulf and I've been a stressed-out mess the past 2 days. Good gracious.

I've had to accept that while this vacation will be a break in the sense of getting away and spending time with family and getting to play in the sand and ocean (hopefully!) all day versus chasing down and entertaining my boys on my own, it's also going to be work. And busy. And even exhausting.

We'll still have some behavior issues with Garrison. We'll still have to make sure Austin doesn't eat sand or crawl away from us on the beach. We'll still have to make sure Austin gets at least 1 good, long nap everyday and that they both get in the bed at a decent hour. And we'll still have to make sure they are fed and bathed daily. Haha!

This is the season we're in. While it's frustrating and exhausting on a regular basis, I know it will go by fast and once it's over I'll be kind of sad. Because even though my babies getting older means having to pack a little less and relax a little more on vacations, it also means they're growing up. Boohoo!

And changing the subject now...I'm torn about blogging and picture taking next week. Part of me wants to really live in the moment and soak everything up as much as possible. And if I have my camera nearby, great. If I don't, I don't. Because I want to live it. Not just look back at pictures and remember but to actually live it.

But there's another part of me that wants to snap pictures and write blogs about every single little detail because I know I'll appreciate and treasure it. One day I'll LOVE reading and looking back at pictures and remembering vacations from years past.

I've just got to find a balance. Which I think means making sure I'm not the only one with the camera every single day. And maybe planning a time for taking pictures and then putting the camera away. And maybe blogging about the highlights, but not if it takes me away from my family and our vacation. Guess we'll see...

Ready or not, vacation is upon us and I'm planning to embrace the craziness and make the best of it!

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

On my Mind in June... Vacation!

*THE BEACH. The countdown is officially on as we prepare to leave for the beach later this week. Finally! Yay!! Maybe it's the fact that things have been so wild and crazy around here lately, or the fact that we're returning to our "first love" (PCB) after being away the past 2 years, or the fact that I'm just longing for a break from the regular old routine, but I am craving this vacation more than years past. Getting this excited about the beach makes me feel like a kid again. =)

*However... when it comes to this vacation, everytime I feel really excited and happy about it almost being here, I get a teeny bit nervous too. This will be our first ever vacation with 2 boys. And our first ever vacation with one of those boys being 9 months old. He's very mobile and busy, he still puts everything in his mouth, and he still takes 2 long naps a day. Hmmm. I'd better start coming up with ideas to keep him occupied and in one place while we're on the beach AND flipping a coin with Terrell for naptime duty. Haha. It'd be great if he'd take his morning nap on the beach but we'll have to wait and see. Baby boy is used to his quiet room with the fan blowing and the light off.... ocean waves, bright sunshine, and lots of people might be a distraction.

*My sister and I have already come up with a rough draft of restaurants we'll be eating at while we vacation. We actually came up with the list a long time ago, but since it's finally almost here I've been thinking about it some more. We sure have missed all the good eating PCB has to offer. Just another thing I'm looking forward to. (As long as it means my big boy feeling good and not having an upset stomach, and my baby boy content in his highchair and in a good mood throughout our dinners.)

*Father's Day afternoon, my mom, sister, and I started our list of grocery items we'd need to pack and the meals we'd have at the townhouse. My parents always take care of the cold stuff since they pack the cooler and we try to take care of the non-cold stuff. I love being able to go out a few nights and stay in a couple of nights too. It breaks things up and allows us to have a couple of longer days at the beach without having to come in and get ready but still gives us evenings out at yummy restaurants and doing fun stuff with the boys.

*I think every member of the family has been checking the 10 day forecast for Panama City daily. Last year at New Smyrna Beach we kinda had a bad experience with the weather. It wasn't very cooperative. In fact, one afternoon, the beach patrol (or whatever you call them) forced everyone off the beach. And one day Terrell and my dad had to brave high winds and pouring rain while chasing down our tent as it toppled down the beach. They sprinted out into the bad weather and chased down everything the wind tried to blow away. We watched from a distance. Sheltered from the weather. They were our heroes.

*I'm going to try a different packing method for the boys' clothes this year. My sister saw it on Pinterest (I'm still not on but thinking maybe I should just go ahead and get it over with) and I'm hoping it will make both their suitcases and all of their cute little clothes super organized. I'm going to put their outfits for each day in seperate ziplock bags that will be labeled with the day of the week. That way I'll avoid pulling out tons of clothes and making a big mess when trying to decide what I want them to wear everyday. It will already be decided and it will keep the suitcases nice and neat. Now we just need to finalize the nights we're staying in and the ones we're going out (and to where) so I can get started on this new idea.

*I still don't have a book to take with me... I'm sort of torn about it because I know most of my time in the car will be spent entertaining/answering questions/reading to/singing with, etc one or both of my boys, and my time on the beach will be spent watching their every moves and making sure they aren't in danger or eating sand. Still, I'd like to take one just in case. I'm sure I'll have some opportunities to read in the car. And some during naptime maybe. But in order for me to get a book, I have to go to the library. Which means Garrison will want to check out some books too. Except I don't want to take any library books for him to the beach because I'm afraid of losing them or forgetting them or something bad happening to them. I'm thinking we'll just take some from home. Hmmm. When can I go to the library by myself??

*Unfortunately, I am still lacking in the "tan" department. When it's super hot outside, we tend to stay indoors... or do fun things out and about indoors... or just wait for daddy to get home. And since I can't take the boys to the pool by myself, I haven't seen a whole lot of sunshine lately. I still apply my Jergens Natural Glow lotion daily. It works... just not as good as whatever the youth girls at my church are using. Every teenaged girl I saw at church on Sunday was a tanned goddess. They know the secret. I'm wondering if it's a tanning bed. Or unlimited time to lay by the pool. I'm convinced it has to be one of the two. Oh well. Hopefully I won't burn from all the exposure. That's why I'm packing plenty of SPF.

*Getting ready for vacation is exciting and overwhelming and lots of work and exciting some more, all at the same time. Now I'm praying we all stay healthy, all stay safe, and all have a great time!!

Monday, June 18, 2012

Father's Day Weekend

Just as we expected and predicted, Father's Day weekend was busy but fun and definitely made us both long to live in Barnesville. There's just something about knowing the drama would be cut in half, at the very least, if only we were going to bed and waking up in our own house. Not to mention no more packing! Sigh. Maybe it'll happen one day. We always say that living in Barnesville won't make life perfect or problem free or holidays any less busy, but it sure would make things a little easier and less stressful and more relaxing. Ahhh. Okay, daydream over. Back to reality.

After the craziness of Mother's Day weekend we decided to celebrate Father's Day with Terrell on Friday night before arriving in the hometown for the weekend on Saturday. And it worked out really good. Maybe it's even a new tradition. We let daddy pick out where he wanted to go out to eat and he decided on Mellow Mushroom. We hadn't been there in forever and we love their pizza! It was crazy busy and loud but we didn't have to wait and we had a yummy dinner.

Here's a shot of my view for the night... 

And a shot of Terrell's...
Our pizza was delicious and daddy was reminded of what being a father is all about... feeding your 9 month old and spending most of the evening making sure he doesn't escape his highchair while also sharing marinara sauce, parmesan cheese, and loud but interesting conversations with your 3 year old. We love daddy so much. =)

When we got home we gave daddy his cards and present while mama got a picture of all 3 boys.

The next day we loaded up half the house and made the trip to Barnesville for some good ole family time. We met Terrell's parents for lunch after dropping off Bailey and lots of vacation stuff at my parents' house (it's almost here!!) and then spent the day with his parents. Austin napped while Garrison played in the sand. He loves the sand. I told Terrell we may have to force him to get wet next week because he'll be so wrapped up and content just playing in the sand.

*Garrison doesn't go to sleep during naptime every single day anymore, so we let him skip a nap/rest time on Saturday. We would question this decision before bedtime. Gracious.

After afternoon baths and everyone getting ready, we ventured out to meet Kara and her family at an O'Charley's that's about 45 minutes away... that's how long it's supposed to take to get there. Due to vacation traffic (we're guessing) it took us almost an hour and a half to get there. This made Austin a little fussy upon arrival and kind of started our evening off on a stressful note. Eating out with 4 kiddos 4 and under is always pretty crazy, BUT we had more issues with our kids than we ever have at a restaurant. Our boys have always been great at restaurants. They both like to eat and we've established a consistent routine of them staying seated throughout the meal unless there's a true emergency... and we had one this time.

Shorty after our food arrived Garrison had an upset stomach and spent the majority of dinner in the bathroom with Nana. (Bless his heart. And Nana's.) Then, Austin was super fussy after he finished his baby food. I'm not sure if it was the hour and a half ride in the carseat or what. He was crying, whining, or trying to escape almost the entire time. Finally we got him out of the highchair and took turns holding him. I think we "visited" with Kara and her family 5 minutes total. Crazy. So my husband came up with the idea of meeting at a park and doing something picnic style next time. My only requests were that there be absolutely no pollen in sight and that it be 90 degress or cooler (preferably cooler) temperature-wise.

On the way back to Barnesville we stopped at my parents' house to give my dad his Father's Day gifts because my parents hosted Father's Day at their house and we wouldn't have a good opportunity to give gifts on Sunday. My dad has wanted a "big screen" TV forever, so my mom surprised him BIG TIME with one for Father's Day. It was huge. He loved it. =)
Once we left Granna and Papa's it was back to Nana and Pops' house for bedtime. A meltdown occurred. Of course. But finally both boys went to bed and we were able to relax for the rest of the night.

Sunday morning was wild. Terrell woke up sick. Garrison had a major meltdown. Again. My nerves were shot. Which almost led me to a meltdown of my own. We went to church without Terrell. Thankfully he was able to come later. We had an emotional service at church. We cried. I think that covers everything.

Finally things got a little better once we all got settled at my parents' for lunch. Garrison played outside while Papa grilled. Austin ate lunch but then went down for his nap before we all had lunch. We visited with family. We enjoyed a delicious feast. We celebrated all the fathers in the room. We caught up. It was fun and relaxing. And my mom sent us home with leftovers and summer clothes she bought for the boys to wear on vacation. I tell Terrell a lot that I want to be like her when I grow up. =)

The only glitch we had the whole afternoon was Garrison crying because he didn't want to leave. And we weren't even ready to leave at that point. Can you say delirious from exhaustion? But that was nothing that a visit to the Little Debbie truck couldn't fix. Then when it was time to leave he started crying because he thought mama and daddy did leave him. Oh my. We got the boys home and in bed as early as possible.

I'm so thankful to have celebrated Father's Day with so many great dads. And I'm even thankful for our crazy weekend. It means we're blessed with lots of family and that we're all really close... something I long for my boys to grow up with.

Happy Father's Day!!!

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Embracing Craziness Part 2: Put to the Test

Well just as soon as I wrote about embracing the craziness of our life right now and made the decision to work on a better attitude and less stress amidst the craziness, I was put to the test. Should've known that would happen.

Tonight was crazy with a capital C. I almost have to laugh as I recall the events of the evening. But I'm really tired. Sigh. Still, I don't want to forget because this is my journal and our family scrapbook, so document and record I must. Here goes...

Terrell got home a little later than normal from work but we proceeded with our regularly scheduled plans of him grilling us hamburger steaks and me cooking green beans and Paula Deen's mashed potatoes as sides. (It would be my first time attempting these potatoes but the recipe was about as simple as they come and I was planning to follow it exactly so they should turn out perfect and delicious.)

Terrell and Garrison went outside to play and grill while Austin and I stayed inside so I could cook and Austin could get into everything... specifically kitchen drawers and Bailey's dog food. Entertaining him, while cooking, while bending down to pick him up and remove him from danger or potential danger no less than 37 times was pure craziness all by itself. And pretty soon I was the one with an aching back.

However, the real craziness of the night began with the potatoes. They turned out terrible. Apparently what I considered 8 medium red potatoes actually equated to 4 teeny tiny small potatoes when following the recipe. My poor, pitiful potatoes were swimming in milk, sour cream, and butter. They were like potato soup, except drowning in butter. It was pretty devestating. I wanted to go to my room and cry (because I honestly can't recall a recipe I've totally ruined) but instead I fed my starving baby (he's not used to eating at the super late hour of 6:20) and tried to enjoy our low-carb dinner... if you don't count the garlic bread.

We made it through supper without any other major issues... almost. The doorbell rang just before we finished eating and Bailey started barking her head off and Austin got fussy and Garrison asked 20 questions about who was at the door and why Bailey was barking and who daddy was talking to and why Bailey had to be put up, etc. It was a little crazy. Especially since daddy stayed outside talking to the AT&T sales people forever.

After daddy came back in we cleaned up from supper and got ready for baths. I got Austin ready for his while Terrell and Garrison went to clean up all their baseball stuff outside before coming in for Garrison's bath. As I'm getting ready to put my naked baby into his bathtub, he tinkles. For a reeeallly long time. While I'm holding him. I just sort of froze. Baby boy had to go bad. It drenched my shirt, went down my leg, soaked my flip flops, and formed mulitple puddles on the bathroom floor. Yuck.

Terrell and Garrison were still outside and I had a naked baby now in the bathtub with no where to go. And still dripping with tee tee. So I started yelling for Terrell as loud as I could. Haha. As soon as he heard me I could hear panic in his voice so I quickly assured him I was fine, just covered in urine. I finished giving Austin a really fast bath before Terrell took over and I stripped down and tried to rid myself of the yuckiness and fought to urge to cry yet again. Gracious.

After giving Garrison his bath and putting Austin to bed, the doorbell rings again. Cue to the barking. (And the questions from my big boy.) As Terrell went outside to talk to the AT&T sales people again, I proceeded to chase Bailey around like a crazy person so I could pick her up and put her in our bedroom so she wouldn't wake my sleeping baby. Desperate times cause for desperate measures... including me looking like a fool chasing my dog around the house. That girl could really benefit from obedience school. I'm sure the sales people didn't know what they were in for ringing my doorbell tonight. Maybe next time they'll think twice.

The whole evening was one thing after another. The circus returned. Literally. It was wild and crazy... and eventually pretty funny. Now I can sit back and chuckle a little. But only because my boys are sound asleep and the house is peaceful. The good news is that we're all in one piece and we all survived the craziness AND mama did not have a meltdown or stress out or even shed a tear from all the drama. Yay for successfully embracing craziness!

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Embracing Craziness

Almost every single day since our anniversary weekend has been crazy... we've been in 100% survival mode around here and I've yet to catch my breath. (We did have one day where I thought normacly had returned for good, or at least had a chance of returning for good, but that proved to be really short lived.) Life has been wild. A circus. OVERWHELMING. Stressful. An adventure. A whirlwind. Tough. Crazy. Okay, those are all the adjectives I can think of.

And let's just say I haven't been handling all the craziness very well. In the midst of the gazillion things we have going on, instead of rising to the challenge and "stepping up", I've been stressed and overwhelmed and struggling to keep it together- with some pouting and feeling sorry for myself mixed in. Being a grown up is hard. And right about now, I'm wishing I was better at it.

Between Premier shows/invitations/jewelry orders/hostess packets, Terrell's back issues/doctor's appointments/baby-sitting needs, Garrison's sometimes bad behavior/issues with Austin (a whole other post), 10 different appointments coming up this summer, preparing for my new job and taking care of more baby-sitting needs for my trainings this summer and pre-planning before school actually starts, searching for the time to shop for Father's Day gifts/making it somewhat of a special day for my husband/dividing time between our families, getting stuff done and taken care of and packed up for vacation in less than 2 weeks, and being crazy busy trying to keep up with my boys and the responsibilites of our home... my sanity might be hanging by a thread. And my poor husband has to live with me! And be my sounding board. Bless him.

I feel behind on everything.... Father's Day, Premier, laundry, vacation stuff, our original summer calendar, "me" time, haha. And I do not like being behind. I like staying ahead and getting things done waaay before the last minute. When it comes to just about anything, I'm the opposite of a procrastinator. So in addition to things being crazy around here, I've been a little crazy myself. And occasionally emotional. But mostly just crazy. My husband can confirm.

Maybe it's the age of my kids, or the fact that I'm used to a slower pace and much more predictable routine, OR the fact that I just don't handle having 50 things going on at once very well, but the past week and a half have made me question my parenting, my ability to keep our househould running smoothly, my patience, my multi-tasking skills, my role as a wife, and so on, and so on...

At least my hair dresser/stylist told me yesterday she knew it wasn't easy to be in my shoes but that it would get easier with time. And I didn't even share half of the craziness with her! But that one little line made me feel better and like maybe I wasn't losing my mind afterall. She also told me I would blink and my babies would be entering their senior year in high school just like her baby. The days are long but the years are short. I have to keep remembering that.

I feel terrible complaining. I feel guilty for venting. I just feel terribly guilty on top of it all. Like I have no right. Because at the root of all the craziness and busyness that's causing me to feel uptight and tense and anxious, is blessings. An abudance of blessings.

I am blessed that I have 2 sweet boys on my hands 24-7. Beyond blessed that they are healthy and busy and smart and into everything. 

I am blessed that I have a lot going on in Premier right now because it means that I'm providing a little income for our family. And I'm super blessed that I'm able to do most of my work from home.

I am blessed to be celebrating Father's Day with several amazing fathers this weekend. My boys are surrounded by loving, hard working, Christian "dads" in their life. Our weekend will be busy and will make me long to live in Barnesville, but more than anything it will be fun and special.

I am blessed to be preparing for a week long vacation to the beach soon. It won't be easy preparing for the trip but it will be SO worth it to spend a week away with my family hanging out at the beach, playing in the ocean, and providing fun new memories and experiences for my babies.

I am blessed to be starting my dream job in August. Teaching preschool 3 days a week was kind of always my future dream job. I didn't know it would come with my babies so young or that it would include having another job at the same time with Premier, but it is still an answered prayer. My boys will be with me and it will be fun, laid back, and part time. (Key words.)

I am blessed to have parents, a sister, and in-laws who make life easier for us. They baby-sit when we need them, they help me out at hair and picture appointments with the boys, they fold our laundry and clean our stove (thanks mama!), they trim our big ole trees to get them off the house, and they even hire someone to finish painting the rest of our house because we won't be able to anytime soon. They've set the bar high and we are so blessed to have them.

I am blessed that I have an amazing husband who does rise to the challenge and definitely steps up when I need him most. You are awesome, Terrell Selph. Even if you don't know what to say to me anymore when I vent and complain.

While I'm still a tad overwhelmed and things are still kinda crazy here, lately I've been reminded of how truly blessed I am. A LOT. And sometimes that fact makes me feel worse because the guilt starts flooding in. But more than anything it makes me feel grateful and convicted and reminded to give thanks in everything, praise Him in everything, and to rely on Him in everything.

God hasn't changed or moved even though I feel like I'm spinning out of control sometimes. He's always been faithful. So because I know I'm blessed and because I know that He's with me even when I'm struggling to keep it together and multi-task and on the verge of losing it, I'm praying I'll learn to embrace the craziness ahead of me instead of dreading it or stressing over it or being overwhelmed because of it. Most of all I want to remain grateful and to have a better attitude. I'm sure my husband will second that. =)

Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
all I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Monday, June 11, 2012

9 Months Old

Austin is 9 months old! His 9 month birthday was actually last Sunday on the 3rd, BUT since our 9 month well-check wasn't until today, and since this time last week was even crazier than this time this week, I decided to hold off on Austin's monthly update.

This month has been a tad wild and crazy when it comes to Mr. Austin. Sort of like one big adventure of chasing him down and keeping him away from stuff he can't have, and rescuing him from a certain big brother who has become really rough lately, and removing dog food or bits of trash from his teeny little fingers. He has been on the move constantly this month. What an adventure! He's not walking yet, or even showing signs of walking, but this mama ain't scared. Baby boy gets where he wants to go already. And fast.

He keeps us running... and laughing and smiling and cuddling and loving on him and kissing those sweet, chubby cheeks. This sweet boy melts my heart on a regular basis and I am SO thankful for the gift he is to our family.

Garrison at 9 months. This picture makes me laugh. Garrison loved to smile huge-mouth-wide-open smiles at this age. =)

Stats and Happenings This Month:

*You weigh 18 pounds, 9.5 ounces and are 27 inches long. You are in the 20th percentile for weight and the 15th for height. Even though you're a tad on the small size you're still a chunky little butterball to us! It was shocking to hear that you're considered "small" since you're so rolly and heavy. Ha! But, you are growing great and very proportiate and will more than likely catch up with a growth spurt in the future.
*You are still wearing size 4 diapers and are now in mostly 12 months clothes... with some 6-12 mixed in.
*You got 2 more teeth on top! And, after your birthday last Sunday, another one broke through! You now have 4 in a row on top and the 2 middle ones on the bottom.
*Teething took it's toll this month. You ran a fever off and on for a few days, your appetite decreased some, and you became way more fussy than usual. But we think you're back to your happy, content, busy little self now!
*You now take 4 bottles a day of about 5 ounces each. And since your appetite decreased some you don't LOVE your baby food like you used to. You still like to eat and are ready for food as soon as you get in the highchair, but you're just a little more picky. Pears, apples, and sweet potatoes and corn seem to be your favorite foods.
*This is a biggie.... You rarely spit up anymore! For months it felt like this day would never come. I hardly ever have to change your clothes during the day and if you spit up it's usually a really small amount every other day, if that. This is a very exciting milestone! Reflux is over!! 
*You've become an even better sleeper. We are so blessed! You go to bed between 7:30 and 8:00 every night and wake up between 7:45 and 8:15 every morning. You still take 2 morning naps that are both an hour and a half to 2 hours long.
*You learned to say bye-bye and ma-ma this month. I love hearing little words come out of your mouth!
*You learned how to crawl a "regular" crawl this month. You still army crawl a lot too because you're so fast.
*You pull up on any and everything you possibly can. Garrison even had to rescue you when you pulled up on his Little Tikes grill and it tobbled over.
*Your relationship with Garrison is changing now that you're so mobile. You follow him around and love to play with his toys and now ya'll can actually play together. One of your favorite things to do together is for Garrison to stand at one end of the hall and hit (plastic) golf balls to you at the other end. You both love that game.
*Your personality continues to grow and shine and you are such a sweet and busy baby! We love you soooo much and are so thankful for you! Happy Birthday baby boy!!

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Normalcy and a Car Party

We've been celebratin' around here today! Daddy's medicine is helping him feel LOTS better! He can get out of bed. He can sit and stand and walk. He can function. Yay!! His MRI is scheduled for late Monday afternoon and our follow up appointment to that isn't until after Father's Day, BUT, he has some temporary relief. Praise the Lord! He's still taking it easy and still being extra careful but we are soooo thankful to have daddy almost back to normal!

Speaking of getting back to normal... life around here was crazy while daddy was unable to work or help out with the boys or do much around the house. For some reason my pretty predictable, pretty normal, pretty uneventful (for the most part) days turned into a complete circus. Austin was fussy... Garrison was wild... Austin was fussy... Garrison was wild. Repeat 5 times. I was pulled in 3 different directions constantly and things were just out of control. I thought I was going to lose my sanity. I think I actually did a couple of times. I felt like a terrrible wife and mom. Not fun.

But today, daddy went back to work and we officially resumed our regular ole routine and schedule of events and it has been WONDERFUL. I've still been busy and I'm still yawning as I sit here typing, but what a difference today has made! Order has returned to our home. (I hope I'm not jinxing the rest of the day.) And our party of 4 has been celebrating... by going to the library, and having lunch with daddy, and taking good afternoon naps, and even by having a different kind of party. One that takes place during Austin's morning nap.

A car party. Garrison came up with this idea yesterday while daddy was still staying off his feet, and so he could be close to daddy, he located the party in our bedroom. And today we had another one. Everyone was invited. His whole bucket full of cars. Plus the gang from Mickey Mouse. Plus his Hummer since it's a big part of the whole shindig.

First, the Hummer finds a spot and then the whole gang gets to climb up on top. And don't forget Mickey hitched up to the back. Then all the cars drive in and find a parking spot as close as they can to the hummer. And if you get there early, you might even get to park under the hummer.

Quite a variety of guests are invited. We've got Fast and Furious types (in case anybody's up for a race), Mater (in case anyone needs towing), emergency rescue vehicles (in case of an accident), a school bus that's been transporting children since 1981 (true story... the year is on the bottom), a garbage truck and cement truck (cause they need a break from working occasionally), and even the army is invited (in a truck that's been around since 1983). Everyone is welcome. Ooops. Except for Austin. Whenever Austin tries to join the party after waking up from his nap, Garrison starts frantically yelling, He's tryin to get my car party! He's bout to get my car party!

It really is a fun party. Just like a scene from a music video. Ha! The party planner is very proud of his work and happy to provide a fun time for everyone.

Normalcy has returned to the Selph household. How sweet it is. Now we just need it to stick around for a while!

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

On the Homefront...

*My husband is feeling a little better and was actually able to eat with us at the table tonight instead of in bed alone... until I hurried him back to bed as soon as he finished.

*We had a doctor's appointment this morning with his back specialist. Terrell rode over an hour in the backseat. Bless his heart. We got some medicine for him to help him get back to normal while we wait for a long term solution. We'll know more after he has an MRI.

*Did I say he's feeling a little better?! Yay!! Thank you Lord for relief from pain and my husband's sense of humor returning! For a while there, he wasn't himself at all. And I felt terrible and helpless.

*Garrison has been very concerned about daddy. He's been thoughtful and considerate and loving. So sweet.

*Garrison has not been very concerned about mama. And the fact that she is overwhelmed. In fact, he's been a wild man at times. He knows things are different right now and something's up and that we don't really have a plan... therefore he has too much time on his hands... therefore he's been a HANDFUL.

*We both (me and Garrison) had a meltdown in the car yesterday afternoon when I insisted that we get out of the house and he insisted he wanted to stay home and run around like a crazy person. Then I felt totally guilty about my meltdown and that my sweet, innocent Austin had to witness his brother and mama completely lose it. (A milkshake made us all feel a little better.)

*So thankful my mom could come over yesterday morning and AnAn could come over this morning. I'm not sure what we would have done without them!

*I haven't cooked in DAYS. It's crazy. However, it does feel like all I do is prepare meals for everyone in the house. And take them back and forth to the bedroom or dining room 50 times a day.

*Poor Austin is having some separation anxiety issues since our anniversary weekend and being away from mama and daddy so much lately. He had the hardest time going to sleep tonight. Which is really rare for him. I felt so sorry for him. And myself.

*I have several "irons in the fire" with Premier right now. The timing is less than ideal. I'matadstressed.

*Since Terrell's back went out, I've felt exhausted and emotional. And frustrated with myself for feeling exhausted and emotional. Scratch that. For being exhausted and emotional.

*Sometimes it's just a circus around here. I never realized how calm things are when daddy's not out of commission.

*On the bright side, Terrell is feeling better and better and we have a plan in place to get some long term answers/solutions and I'm going to attempt to get us back on a regular schedule tomorrow which should help things out a ton. As my friend April would say, It could always be worse. And we're especially grateful that it's not.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Anniversary Weekend

Tomorrow, Terrell and I will celebrate 7 years of marriage. 7!! For some reason that seems waaaay longer than 5 or 6. Ha. At times, these past 7 years feel more like 17. Like we've been together forever. But at times it's also hard to believe it's been 7 years. 7 years ago tomorrow, we were saying our vows and getting married and starting our new life together. How is it possible its been that long? Crazy.

Anyway, on to our weekend. Every year since we've been married we've planned an anniversary trip/getaway to celebrate. It's our gift to each other and something we look forward to every year. Time away. Time alone. Time to sleep late. Ahhh. It's the little things.

This year was different though. Really different. This year we decided to stay home and have an anniversary staycation. It's what the budget allowed and we'd still have time for lots of things we never get to do... go out on dates, sleep late, shop, go out to breakfast, watch movies, carry on long uninterrupted conversations, etc. Even though I was nervous about staying home and missing the boys (who would be with my parents for the weekend) and feeling like I should be cleaning or something, I was really looking forward to a weekend with my hubby to do whatever we wanted to do.

Unfortunately, things didn't turn out exactly like we'd planned. Far from it I'm afraid. In the words of my husband, "Well this weekend has turned out to be a total bust." Sad but true.

I took the boys to B'ville Friday morning and got them settled and half our house unloaded at my parents' and got back on the road to Covington sometime between 12:30 and 1:00. Leaving Austin wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be. I was sort of convinced I might cry all the way home. Thankfully, I felt really at peace about leaving both of my babies in good hands and tried not to dwell on Austin thinking I abandoned him.

By the time I got home Terrell was off work, because he took a half day of vacation, and we had decided we'd have a lazy afternoon together and watch the first "segment" of the Hatfield's and McCoy's before going out on a date to Long Horn... despite the fact that my hubby's back had started giving him trouble the day before. Oh no.

(Terrell has had back trouble for years. He's had several doctor's visits, x-rays, an MRI, the epidural shots, you name it. Everything short of surgery. So whenever he re-aggravates it, it's usually pretty serious.)

Even though he was uncomfortable, my hubby was a trooper and decided he was fine with going out to eat and he was fine with renting a movie for later because he knew he could stretch out and feel some relief while we watched a movie. So Friday night went really good for the most part. (Although I did miss the boys... being at our house wasn't enough of a distraction for me. Everything made me think about my babies and stuff I needed to do around the house. I think we've decided we won't do another staycation for our anniversary.) Anyway, as of Friday night we thought his back was going to get better and better, and we'd go out to breakfast the next morning and go out shopping and then go to Olive Garden for dinner Saturday night. Just like we'd planned all along.

Too bad none of what we thought was going to happen actually happened. Terrell woke up feeling worse and was staying off his feet and flat on his back as much as possible. We got Chick-Fil-A take out for breakfast (still a treat!) before deciding there was NO way Terrell could ride in a car, walk around shopping with me, and ride in a car some more. So he stayed home and watched a lot of TV and did a little laundry and I went shopping by myself. Which was really nice since I never get to do that, but I was missing my husband and his company and missing my kiddos because our once-a-year weekend without them was starting to seem like a waste.

Saturday night was tough. We did go out to eat but Terrell couldn't fully enjoy himself because of being in pain and by that point I wanted to go pick up the boys early. Neither one of us were having any fun. We were pretty pitiful. I was pouting. Terrell was hurting. I didn't know how to make Terrell feel better. He didn't know how to make me feel better. It was blah. And disappointing.

But looking back, it was truly a blessing that the boys weren't with us this weekend. Terrell was totally out of commission. I would have been pulling double duty plus trying to take care of Terrell, plus trying not to lose my mind.... which almost happened tonight when I got home with the boys and was trying to get all 4 of my babies (Terrell, Garrison, Austin, and Bailey) fed and taken care of. Whew. And the boys had a great time with Granna, Papa, and AnAn. They got to have lots of play time, lots of attention, and lots of fun. They were fine without us and I know it was best that they weren't here.

Even though this weekend was a huge bummer, we still got to sleep late and watch 2 movies and go out to eat twice and talk a lot and just spend time together. We wished things would have turned out differently but it wasn't all bad. We joked that we'll look back and always remember our 7th anniversary and how crazy it turned out. If nothing else, memories were made.

Now we have a goal of getting a doctor's appointment as soon as possible tomorrow. Because instead of Terrell's back getting better and better, it's gotten worse and worse. Please pray for him. It's been a long couple of days and he's ready to feel some relief and get back to normal. And I miss my husband! It's times like these I appreciate him and all he does soooo much. Happy Anniversary to a wonderful husband and daddy!!! I love you more and more every year!